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Treatment of Women

Well let me start off by repeating what a man said to us at the market. All of Mali is vastly different, even from village to village, family to family. Even talking to other PCV, no one has the same experience (which makes sense). But there a bunch of different ethnicities in Mali and some treat their women really well (or thats what their men told us) and others don't. Jade's family is the majority, Bambara people. The Tauregs and Saurai are supposed to treat their women differently/better. So with that in mind, I will tell you about what I have heard but I by no means want to generalize.

So originally, I thought it was all Malian culture for men to really chip in with childcare. But Jade's friend Amanda came to visit who lives in a far more conservative village, much further from the city and not on the main road. She said that Jade's village is really progressive. The men in her village never pick up babies or children. They never draw water, they never wash clothes. Those are all considered to be women's work. And the poor little girls. Around the age of 6 or 7, as boy and girls children begin differentiating in looks, their fathers pretty much stop talking to them. And they start having to train for their lives as women, meaning learning how to pound grain, wash clothes, cook, take care of babies, etc. These things train them to be a good wife.

So turns out, Moussa, Jade's host dad told me that even in Jade's village, their family is progressive. He taught the boys to do their own laundry and they draw their own water. He said he saw how much work the women do and how much easier the male life is and decided the work load was unequal. I draw my own water but sometimes when I'm out there, a boy will tell me to stop and come draw it for me. But I've never seen them do it for their sisters... I have seen them do it for their grandmother though.

Moussa is educated though. He even has women working in his pharmacy. I asked him how acceptable that was and he said that some men gave him crap about it and told him it was a bad decision because women won't be reliable workers cause they will want to go to baptisms and marriages and go cook for their husbands. Its crazy cause women are the hardest working people in Mali. But even his wife Adaam, though she has more freedom than most and her husband is sending her to school, she said if she ever left the house without telling Moussa, it would be grounds for divorce. And here, men keep the children.

Amanda told us some stories that made my blood boil. So there have been several teachers raping their students. These girls are like 11 and 12. Basically their lives are ruined. It will be super difficult for them to marry and their families are shamed. All the blame goes on the girls. They are seen as little seductresses. These families know its the teachers but there is an issue of class here. I asked Amanda why these families don't make the teachers take responsibility and claim the babies but she said these teachers come from Bamako, the city, and her village is mostly poor village farmers. So they don't want to have a confrontation with these city folk who are technically ¨better¨than them socially. It's sad that these girls are blamed for this. And police can't be called in cause it costs a lot of money to call police into a village (each village does not have police) and are also often corrupt. You have to pay a fee for them to come and often they just take your money and don't even solve your issue. Problems are often solved by the village elders.

Also in her school, a girl was recently first in her class. The teacher got up in front of the class and berated everyone for letting that happen. They were like wow boys, you need to do better, how could you let a girl beat you all out, a girllllll. Husbands can take up to four wives and they may beat them normally. This one man in her village beat his wife to death and nothing even happened to him. Poor Amanda, she has been here for two years and the ideology against women has taken a toll on her. She said she was thinking one day about how she would find a career back in the states and she thought to herself, can I really do that? As a woman? Maybe that's too hard for me as a woman. I hope Jade won' t start doubting her abilities and absorbing that aspect of the culture. It's scary to think that you can be that affected by the mentality here. Shudder. Thank the Lord God I was born a woman in the United States at this time.

Geography

People here don't really know much about geography. When we came back from Dogon country, they didn't even know exactly where that was. They were trying to guess the region and didn't get it. We had to tell them where it was in their own country. Jade asked her host brother where Timbuktu was and he insisted it was a region and not a city...Our brothers do have a book with maps of the world. So Jade and I were talking about how funny all of the pictures of the people were. They were all so stereotypical. We immediately could place which countries they were supposed to be from. Out of curiosity, I decided to ask our brother Diaxiacari if he could guess which country each person was from. He couldn't guess a single one. Not even the African child. It was interesting to experience because they were so obvious to us, but we learn about the world and its people. For example, we knew one girl was from Spain because she was dancing Flamenco. But if you never learn about that you would have no idea. I think he guessed Chinese for her. Also, people insist that there are 52 states in America. It's crazy. We tell them there are only 50 and they refuse to believe us. They say they "know about America here"....

Food Sharing

So the other day, Jade's English speaking teacher friend brought up an interesting point. In this culture, they eat together out of the same bowl to show love to one another, and show that you can be close with another person. They eat with their right hands. The left hand is the hand used to wipe yourself in the bathroom. They do not shake with that hand, until you are leaving. If you are leaving a place, they will shake your hand with their left hand, as an insult that you must come back to them later for them to correct that insult. Anyway, Jade and I do not eat with the family because we eat out of our own bowl and also with utensils. So this makes Jade and I, assumedly, people that are not capable of making close friendships and possibly selfish as well. Go figure. We tried to explain that it's simply not our culture to eat out of thesame plate/bowl with someone, especially if we don't know them. You don't know if people's hands are clean, or if they are sick or anything. But it possibly goes past the germ issue. All we know is that it's just not something we regularly do. Interestingly enough, Jade's host dad Moussa also eats in his own bowl. They call him a Tubab (white/french person). He is a pharmacist, so he understands germs and stuff. He also eats with utensils as opposed to his hands. Jade said he doesn't eat with his wife. She usually eats after him or on the side. This is because she prefers to eat with her hands and also sometimes prefer to eat toh with the family instead of rice or ceri (porridge-like food) with Moussa.

Another difference is the call to eat. Before eating, you should call others to eat with you. Even strangers walking by! For the most part, people will say "nay fa le" (I'm full), which is basiclly saying no thanks. But some people will actually come eat your food! Anyway, when Jade first got here, they teased her like "oh Americans don't call people to eat!" And they are right, we don't do that the same way that they do. I had to think about if we do that at all, because people here were making it seem like Americans are selfish. But I thought about it and realized like if I was in my house or was around friends and I got something to eat, I would definitely offer them something to eat as well. But not directly out of my own bowl! Something seperate, for them! The other day, we were at a street vendor getting food, and these random guys came to buy food. Jade got her food first and as SOON as she got it, the stranger says to her "you didn't invite us to eat". Usually, you offer once you are actually about to take a bite, not as soon as you get it. But these guys just totally jumped the gn. Jade was like umm, well you are also at the street vendor, so what are you buying? It was so crazy to us. Like clearly you are about to buy your own food, why would you try to eat ours? And the more annoying thing is that the whole call everyone to eat thing is just the ideal malian way. In Jade's family, i have very rarely been called to eat. But they expect that model behavior from us. They will even walk by us and say "nay fa le", which in this case, is a rude way of saying "you didn't invite me to eat, but i'm full anyway". Or they will flat out call you out, like you didn't invite me to eat. I wanna be like um well you neverrrrr call me to eat. It's so bold.

The other day this girl came in our midst with mango and offered it to Jade's host mother and baby but didn't offer us any. I feel like they try to make us feel like Americans are stingey but I know we would have offered mango. At least offer. It was bold. They say it's their culture to shar food, and they get on us for not offering, but they don't hold themselves to the same standard, at least not to us or not what we see. Jade did say that early on, she explained that she wouldn't eat out of the same bowl, so maybe that's why they don't bother inviting her? Who knows....

Dance Party

Tonight, Sanakoroba got down! There were three parties in the town to celebrate the end of the "bac" (high school diploma exam) for the high schoolers. Jade's host brother Abdoulaye invited me to the dance. That was interesting in and of itself. Jade said that invitations are weird here. So, Abdoulaye asked me when I first got there if I knew there was a dance coming. I said yes. Jade later told me that that was his way of asking me to go with him. I was like you're kidding, he definitely did not ask. She was like naw, you said yes, so you guys are going together. It was sooo crazy! Anyways, the parties were all a lot of fun. They were also eye-opening. As for how they were fun...we went to the first party which was like a big block party. All the kids were there. Everyone formed like a big circle and then they chose like 4 or 5 kids to go inside. First they were doing a dance together, like how we have the Cupid Shuffle or Cha Cha slide back home. I was amazed! Like when in the world did they have time to learn these dances amongst all their chores! Especially the young girls! All these kids could dance. Then, they had what was like a dance competition. They would each dance, then the crowd would vote and one by one, dancers would be eliminated until there was one winner.

Now for the eye-opening part...We went to "la boite" (the club) where the high schoolers were partying. At first, I thought the girls inside were all prostitutes because they were dressed like the prositutes we saw before. But turns out, they were all the girls from the high school! In hot pants, tight shirts, mini skirts, short tight dresses, busty tops, high heels! It was crazy! I was so shocked, like are these the same girls from the daytime with taffe (skirts) down to their ankles!!?!? And they were dancing with the boys and ON the boys like they do elsewhere in the world lol. It was downright scandalous in this culture. They are close to Bamako though and they do watch t.v. in Sanakoroba so they see how even other African countries are less socially restrictive right next to them. And they are teenagers, so I guess that also explains their rebellion against the culture!

Night time is just so polar opposite than the day here though. And I just feel like they must feel like their daytime lives are an oppressive sham. I tried to reason it out at first like "oh, well I only wear certain things at night. I would never wear an evening gown or club attire during they day." But these girls are exposing parts of their body they wouldn't dare show in the day and doing things they absolutely are forbidden to do in the daytime. They must feel the daytime is so ridiculous and they can't wait for the night so they can be "free". Like you can tell if people agree or like something in their culture because they will stick to it under any circumstance. Like I know Muslim girls who like to wear their hijab (scarf) or cover up and would do that no matter what environment they were in. But the second they had the chance, these girls shirked their traditional clothes and habits like they were nothing.

Dogon Trip Part2

Yesterday, we went to see the Bandiagara escarpements. One PC volunteer had a homologue (work partner) who could show us around for a PC price. We saw three differnt villages and had a chance to climb into the cliffs. One area was designated to a wise man, the hogon, who is elected, unlike the village elder. But he is equally or more important. He is only to be served by his virgin daughters and he was bathed, not by water, but by snake tongues. When food was cooked by the women, they sat on a tortoise, and they had to feed the tortoise the food before serving it as a precaution against poison. Apparently, where we were, there are also crocodiles in the rainy season (which is almost started). Crocs are sacred animals here. The cliff dwellings we saw were abandoned by pygmies and then the dogon people, but in other areas of the cliffs, I believe the dogon people are still up there living. Too bad we didn't get to see those.

We had an interesting lunch conversation with our guide. He was telling us he is soon to be married. His parents picked out his wife. According to the PCV whose homologue he is, his wife-to-be is 12 or 13. But although they are engaged, he has to wait for another year and a half or something before they can live together. Probably because she is so young. I tried to ask his age, and he got misunderstood and got flustered and was like oh we don't ask the age of the girl. I tried to explain to him that I was asking about his age, not the girls, and then he said he was like 25 or something. Glad that got cleared up, but I got the distinct impression that since he knew we were Westerners, we would look down on his marrying such a young girl so he didn't want to tell us her age. He never did say hers...

After lunch, we went to go see how they make Bogolan cloth. It's mud-stained cloth, but it's actually quite beautiful. Dogon country is also known for it's indigo prints. I bought a beautiful indigo scarf looking like thing. I would like to make some African clothes here, but we'll see how that goes lol.

After leaving the cliffs, we started on our way to Djenne. This is a world heritage site. The PCV (peace corps volunteer) who lives there said that it is actually quite bothersome for those who live there because they are only allowed to use mud brick for making houses. They would like to advance, but because of the world heritage site laws, they are not able to use any other material. The city is actually an island and we had to take this crazy old barge across. We arrived late at night and weren't sure it was even still in service but after waiting and flashing our lights a lot, the barge came. The city itself is nice and the PCV we stayed with lives in a nice concession and her nyegen (bathroom) is actually inside her house! It's still a nyegen though, lol, nothing real special. But she does have plenty of potable water which is nice. Jade always has to order a jug of water to come to her house. We slept on the rooftop again, and it was one of the best sleeps I've had in Mali yet. The wind was blowing fiercely so there was a nice breeze. It also meant I was covered in dust when I woke up though... ALSO, there were fewer animals in this city it seems! In bandiagara, the night before, I felt like "wow, this is what it would b like to sleep in a jungle". There is a huge cacophany of animals waking up and they make so much noise around the entire city. But Djenne, there were just a few chickens sqwauking that I could hear. Not bad. Relatively peaceful lol.

On our way back to Bamako, we stopped in Segou again for lunch. Sadly, the sandwich shop was closed and I had to get streetfood. I was quite worried but I did not get sick so I'm thankful. I got "fried" rice (really just rice that's orange) and peanut sauce (blehhhh). But I bought a mango, which is always nice. Lastly, before we left, we picked up frozen yogurt in these little plastic bags from a lady. The PCV from Segou said it's the best in the city. And it was soooo good. There's really not a lot of dairy here, so it was nice to have this. And nice because it was sooooo cold. Often, I cannot find a cool drink because there's not always a refrigerator around.. :(

Last night, we had a goodbye dinner for two volunteers who are ETing (early termination). We went to a Chinese restaurant! Honestly, it's been a little weird cause I thought Chinese people were all over the world lol, but there really are not a lot of them here. This restaurant had the most I'd seen since I got here. The food was pretty good and they had a wonderful bathroom with a flushing toilet and toilet paper!! Toilet paper is a prized commodity to Jade and I because it's limited! And quick sidenote, the other day, Jade finally divulged to her host mother that she does not wipe herself with her hand, but that she uses toilet paper. It was quite funny trying to explain to her. The host mother asked me how I keep poop out of my nails when they are so long (which they aren't even that long lol). Jade told her that I use toilet paper and then the big secret was out! The mom wanted to know why Jade still carried the little hand water bucket (they wash themselves with this bucket, after using the bathroom) to the nyegen and Jade basically said because she knew Malian people expected her to bring it lol. It was quite funny, and the host mother said she would try toilet paper and see if she liked it lol.

Dogon Trip Part1

Surprisingly, this has turned out to be an actual vacation! No desert sleeping for us! I thought it was going to be quite scary and had been referring to it as an "adventure" not a vacation. I imagined sleeping outside in the desert with no security around, not having bathrooms, no clean water, huge desert creatures/critters, going hungry, etc. However, we have been able to stay in the PC stage house up north that someone in our travel group miraculously rememebered! So we id sleep in our tent, but on the rooftop, in a gated house :). The care ride was difficult because there is almost nowhere to stop (you have to pee in the bush/brousse-this is what the french call the bush). and there is only 1 road and it's bumpy and uneven and narrow. At least we had rented our own private car (SUV) and there was a bit of air conditioning. I cannot imagine having taken public transport for this trip. I see the big packed, over-crowded giant soutreman-like buses. They look awful.

The road situation is pretty mind-boggling. There is only 1 route to many of these cities, and often the route is not direct. We were heading north, but first had to go way south before going back up. We left around 8h45am (7am from jade's village) and arrived at our final destination around 8h30/9pm. We did make one long stop in a city called Segou to pick up some other PC volunteers and have lunch at a wonderful place. We ate pizza and beef brochette. Sooo good. First real food I've had in awhile. It will be hard to go back to jade's village after all this wonderful food.

Segou and Dogon country in general is nicer than Koulikoro region (where Bamako and Jade's village Sanakoroba are). There are les people and it seems cleaner. It's spacious and the architecture is different. They still have concessions but they are much more interconnected and have little straw huts inside. Today we went to Jigeybonbom, and it's a typical town here. Small enclosed town with winding streets inside and little concessions with huts. The "dugutigi"-village cheif wanted to charge us soooo much for just rice and sauce so we decided not to eat there. So he told us there was a charge of 250 cfa to walk around. That's not much so we ended up paying it anyway, even though it was probably made up. There was like a crowd of about 20 people and kids who followed us the whole time, trying to sell us stuff, or just look at us and try to hold our hands. Everyone else in my group made "little friends" but I kinda refused to do that. Lol, honestly though, cause the stuff these kids play with and get into, and put their hands into is soooo gross and I try to stay as clean as you can over here. In the end, all their "little friends" tried to get something out of them at the end of trip lol.

I've met a lot of PC volunteers on this trop. We are a group of 6 and we are staying in the PC house with others. Sadly, it seems like government ineffieciency and bureaucracy has seeped into the PC as well. There are several volunteers who are early terminating due to issues at their site. It seems like PC has some incompteent folks who won't fix these issues they have been having. One girl has had people repeatedly break into her house and they won't move her site somewhere else. Another girl had men chase her with guns. She however, found out that there has been Al-Qaeda activity in her region, so they have moved her out. It's sad to hear these stories and one of the older PC volunteers says she overheard PC saying like "well we will replace the ones who leave". They aren't solving the root problem at all. They are just letting talented people go and just shoving new people into the same old problematic areas. These volunteers had great potential and good reasons for being here and they aren't leaving after one month like those who can't handle peeing in a hole. They are leaving after a year, because they are prevented from accomplishing the goals they had when they arrived.